There is a long-held assumption that people buy from people they like. Intuitively, this makes a lot of sense. If the client likes you, they are more likely to trust you. And, if they trust you, they are more likely to consider your recommended business solutions.
However, research shows that this is not accurate. In fact, people are more likely to buy from people who they think like them. If people believe you like them and have their best interests at heart, they are much more likely to trust you and to share the opportunities and challenges of their business. We all want to be heard and validated. Think of some of your recent social conversations. Are you more engaged when someone drones on and on about themselves or when someone takes the time to ask you questions, listen, and care enough to drill down even deeper? The truth is it is easier – in personal or professional conversations – when it is all about you and what you want to say. You have a lot of fascinating information to share. But in doing so, you are sending a message that is counter to your overall goal.
So, how can you make it all about the client? What is one of the most effective ways to convey the message that you like the client? Ask questions. Interesting, thought provoking, targeted questions asked throughout a meeting or presentation clearly conveys that you are focused on them, their needs, and their opportunities. It improves the connection the client feels with you and makes them more responsive to your solutions.
For clients, most meetings seem to be all about the presenter. Some presenters believe that they have so much good information to pass along in a compressed time, that they do not have time to take any questions. Equally as off-putting, other presenters tell the client that they want the meeting to be interactive so feel free to interrupt any time. Think of the message that sends – I will take your question only if you force me to.
Getting the client talking within the first 3 minutes sends a message that you are interested in them, and it sets a tone for the rest of the meeting. As you plan your opening remarks, make sure to include a few open-ended questions to engage the client from the beginning.
A yes or no question gives you very little to work with, so consider open-ended questions to give you a window into what the client is thinking or feeling. An open-ended question is perceived by the client as a sign of curiosity and empathetic concern. A yes or no question signals the opposite. More like a speed bump in the meeting, rather than an opening for a meaningful dialogue.
The open-ended question can be used to widen the conversation by getting the client to elaborate on their business. It can also be used to narrow the conversation by asking the client to elaborate and provide you with greater insight. Both outcomes are extremely valuable. The key is to get the client talking.
Once you have asked your question, pause and be quiet. Lean in on your chair. Look your client in the eye. Give them time to think and shape an answer. Do not help by filling the dead air with a reframing of your question. When the client does answer, listen intently. Do not start thinking about your answer half-way through. Listen for the client’s insights, aspirations, or challenges. Only then will you be able to shape your positioning to answer the needs of your client.
Ask your original question, listen intently to the answer, then probe for more information. The most important question you can ever ask is the second question. The use of the follow up question is one of the keys to a great meeting.
Interestingly, research shows that asking additional questions is more important than asking only a few great questions. The more the client has a chance to talk, the more responsive you appear to be and the more connected the client feels to you. Follow-up questions allow the client to elaborate and signals that what the client is sharing is worthy of continued discussion. The more information you have, the easier it is for you to align your solutions to meet the needs of the client. It takes the guesswork out of your positioning.
It is simple. Engaging with the client early, asking questions, and listening carefully, creates a feeling of caring and trust with your client. That caring and trust is at the heart of their decision to work with you.